Lost Recap 6×09: Ab Aeterno (from AckAttack)

I decided, early on, to ride-out the final season of Lost. "Ride-out" meaning no serious speculation and comments posts. Nada. But recaps? Not part of my sworn oath of non-spoilerness. I have found the best website for recapping each episode (free from spoilers and serious speculation). It's just stinkin' funny. The website is http://www.theackattack.net/ and the latest episode, "Ab Aeterno", is recapped here. I'm using their "Ab Aeterno" graphic too (to properly credit).

Here is an excerpt (from www.theackattack.net), background: Daphne is a shape-shifter often seen in the form of a pig from True Blood:

To make matters even worse, Daphne a wild boar stopped by and started eating the dead people! And when it ran away (where’d it run away to, anyway? Do boars walk up ladders? Are they like, built for that?) it kicked Richard’s nail, his only means of escape, out of reach!!

All the fangirls have been waiting patiently to see how hot it would be to see Richard in chains ever since Mocke brought it up, but this is just TOO SAD. We take it back, Richard!! WE’RE SORRY, OKAY??


To make matters EVEN WORSE, if that’s EVEN POSSIBLE, Yeesabella shows up and tells Richard that they’re in Hell! As if that wasn’t already ABUNDANTLY CLEAR!!
But of course it wasn’t Isabella, it was Smokey all gussied up to look like her! He’s all, “I’M IN UR BRAIN, FINDIN UR WEAKNESSES!”


Then we hear Smokey coming back again, and Richard tells Isabella to *swoon* SAVE HERSELF!! And he had to listen to her dying all over again!!!
His back story is even more depressing than Locke’s for chrissakes!! His emo, let me show u it. ;_;


And just as all ye who entered here were about to abandon hope, someone comes in and gets all handsy with Richard, and we’re all like “OMG IS THIS JACOB TOUCHING HIM AND GIVING HIM ETERNAL LIFE/LUCSCIOUS LASHES!?”

Check out the website for more!